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Mea Culpa (For Most of It)

10 Mar

Of all the things I thought I’d be, alone and pushing fifty wasn’t one I considered. What has been so difficult to cope with is the fact that lonely had been a part of my soul and psyche for so long that I didn’t realise it was there until events brought it all home. So, here I am, redolent in the knowledge of wisdom gained and yet more than a little damned because of it. The point? Oh, yes. There should be a point, shouldn’t there? I guess it would be that learning is a good thing, but sometimes you may learn things you don’t like. Every thing I discover about me allows me to potentially be a better person. The fact that during the learning process I may bleed, scream, lament, tantrumise and generally hate the universe and every f*cker in it who apparently has what I want but cannot seem to get right is entirely a side effect.

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Posted by on March 10, 2011 in Love & Loss

 

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